Saturday, October 17, 2009

Friday Afternoon Fun




Friday afternoon I planned an afternoon of fun for Nicholas and Elizabeth, beginning with a trip to my apartment to meet my roommate Rebecca. It's surprising how the simple things in life can bring such excitement to children!
After visiting with Rebecca, we enjoyed some time outdoors feeding the ducks, the fish, and the turtles in the lagoon near our apartment. Talk about exciting times! For them, this experience was euphoric! Of course it was such a delight for me to watch them interact with nature and ask questions! Getting a glimpse of the world through their eyes is so refreshing!

Last, the great finale of our afternoon was the Family Fall Fest at my school. The lawn was filled with smiling children engaging in games, crafts, face-painting, pumpkin decorating, and much more! Elizabeth and Nicholas were among them, overwhelmed by the excitement of it all! Much to my amazement and delight, neither of them ran away from me, got hurt, threw a temper tantrum or wet their pants! If you are a parent or a nanny, you know what I mean! We did have a couple of close calls when their helium balloons floated away into the sky, but I quickly responded with something like, "Now you can make a wish!". That helped turn their disappointment upside-down! Overall, I think a good time was had by all! The best part, I got paid for it!

It was the first beautiful fall day filled with soul-penetrating rays of sunshine and crisp, cool air. The kind that brings back memories in college of hiking through the Blue Ridge Mountains enjoying the beautiful foliage of fall arrayed in hues of red and orange! Following weeks of rain and the compounded stress of school and life, this was a much needed change for me as well as the kids!



Saturday, October 3, 2009

A Soul Pondering

The knowledge of our own poverty brings us to the moral frontier where Christ works. -Oswald Chambers

I have been struck by contemplation of my own spiritual poverty this week. The more I grow in grace, the more I come to grips with my deep need for more. In this soul discovery, I've found the basis for much of my sin is unbelief. As this was turning around in my mind, it really started to bother me. So, I took some time to journal and asked myself the question: "If I really believed God is who He says He is and will do what He says He will do, then how would my thoughts and actions change?" Needless to say, the list was inexhaustible and I very quickly felt overwhelmed by the contrast of God's magnitude and my fluttering unbelief. In the end, I stopped to worship Him for who He is and recognize that He is in charge of changing me. It is my charge to repent and give myself again to His shaping. My mantra in prayer this week was, "Lord, help my unbelief!" In other words, transform me from the inside out. I want to act in accordance with the truth about God that dwells deep within. The basis for all of this thinking is of course the fact that we innately act out what we believe to be true (Proverbs 12:20). If I worry when God says not to worry (The truth being everything is under His control), then clearly I am faltering in my belief that God is, in fact, in control.

The past few weeks, in conjunction with this, I have also been meditating on Romans 6 all the while asking God to transform my heart. I come back to this passage daily to soak in its pungency. I can hardly grasp this concept of grace in my life! My hope is that as this passage becomes part of me, I will begin to be transformed by the power of the Holy Spirit. On top of all of this inner turmoil, I have experienced tremendous amounts of grace in context of friendships, work and study. My heart sings with gratitude, but it also stings with a sense of unworthiness. Experiential knowledge leaves an indelible impression, yet sometimes a much harder lesson!